He was the only son of a Grammy award-winning veteran actress. He had undoubtedly mingled with the most elite of Hollywood, and surely experienced more red carpets and star-studded events than your average 26 year old.
At just 30 years old, she had attained many accolades. Emmy-nominated correspondent and attorney boasting an MBA, 685k followers on Instagram, and that coveted blue check mark. And if that wasn’t enough, she was crowned Miss USA in 2019.
Most people would look at these two young people and assume they had it all. But success according to this world’s standards is never able to fully satisfy the soul’s longings.
And on January 21, 2022, that inescapable longing ultimately led to tragedy as the former deejay and musician ended his life. Nine days later, the former Miss USA did the same.
The world has been heartbroken to witness the tragic back-to-back suicides of Ian Alexander Jr. and Cheslie Kryst. These recent headlines have hit me especially hard because I am a very empathetic person. It’s difficult for me to think about how Regina King must have felt at the news that her only son was gone. I cannot fathom Cheslie’s mother reading her daughter’s final words saying she left all her possessions to her. My eyes are watering just thinking about these mothers.
These tragedies have resonated with me on an even deeper level because I know how powerful the mind is and how helpless one can feel to control it. I know what it’s like to be weary. I know how it feels to carry indescribable pain and trauma. I understand the defeat one feels when they have unsuccessfully tried everything. I know the mental and emotional depths depression can take you.
Life can be so hard, and it burdens me every time I am reminded just how much people are battling with behind closed doors.
I am grateful that I have never contemplated suicide, but I know what it’s like to want to give up.
That’s why I immediately paused to pray upon learning about these two people who sadly gave up. I prayed for our minds to be set free and filled with peace and that mental health would be an even greater priority around the world. Because the constant battle that goes on within our minds is so real, and I hope these devastating recent events open our eyes to this warfare reality.
Sin is absolutely destructive, and it continues to wreak havoc in this world. And as I continue to age and experience the many intricacies of life, I am convinced that one of the biggest consequences of living in this sinful world is our minds constantly being under attack.
Pastor Tony Evans said it best when he preached, “Everything visible and physical is controlled or derived from that which is invisible and spiritual. If you want to fix the visible and physical problems you are experiencing in your life, you have to address the spiritual and invisible issues behind them.”
It’s easy to point to depression, anxiety, and other mental health disorders as the cause of so many suicides in America. But we cannot overlook the spiritual source of our physical struggles—and the constant warfare against our minds leads the battle.
Ian Alexander Jr. tweeted that Instagram wasn’t healthy for him. Cheslie Kryst spoke of being cyber bullied. Social media is certainly a huge tool the enemy can use to distort our thinking, but technology is only one of the many mediums influencing our thoughts.
That rejection from the job you applied for screams that you’re not smart enough.
Everyone around you getting married reinforces that you’re unworthy.
Your father being absent in your life tells you you’re unlovable.
Not having curves like the Instagram model forces you to feel unattractive.
And the effects of sin also go beyond the areas in which we’re lacking. You can have the highest-paying job, most expensive car, and breathtaking home with a spouse and family and still be at war within your mind. Sin’s appetite is insatiable, and it will convince our minds that nothing is ever enough. If we aren’t careful to guard our thoughts and secure them with the word of God, we can easily find ourselves mentally and emotionally overwhelmed as we desperately seek validation, acceptance, love, and fulfillment from people, places, and things that can never fully satisfy us.
So, I pray that we will take a stand in the midst of our sorrow for Ian, Cheslie, and the countless others who have been affected by suicide. The bible says, “Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.”
This battle is real. The enemy is real. And the struggles of life in this fallen world are real. Satan is at war for your mind, and he will use any and everything to urge you to give up. Let’s make a daily commitment to protect our minds through spending time in the word of God, regularly talking to a loved one or resource when we’re suffering, and guarding what we allow to influence our thoughts.
If you’ve ever had thoughts of suicide, please call the National Suicide Prevention Line at 800-273-8255.
Check out these scriptures below for help with protecting your mind through God’s word:
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.-Romans 12:2
You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.–Isaiah 26:3
For though we walk in the flesh, we are not waging war according to the flesh. For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds.We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ.- 2 Corinthians 10:3-6
Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth.–Colossians 3:2
To put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.–Ephesians 4:22-24